literature

Thinking Bliss

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openmeadow's avatar
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Literature Text

Thinking Bliss

For once, all was peaceful.  There were no planets to rush off and save, no wars to be deflected, no  enemies anywhere near, and therefore no need to go after them. It was peaceful.  The day started with a brilliantly colored sunrise which turned his home-planet's sole mountain range a deep shade of rose-y gold before continuing on it's way to light the rest of the planet's surface.  It could have been perfect. Not could have; was. There was no reason for it to be anything else. For once, in a great many centuries, his dreams had come true- a visit to the planet he had called home since he was young, his birth planet.  A gentle wind swept past him, and on it, he could smell the aethir blossoms. Summer. His favorite season. Caravi hardly dared to move, lest he destroy the absolute silence and tranquility that soaked into his very flesh, easing out the tensions and pain that he had carried for so long. It was good to be home, he thought with a small smile- the most he had ever come to showing his happiness in at least a year, earth-reckoning.  

The only problem was- it was just a dream. Caravi stumbled from his bed, trying to figure out just what had pulled him out, and found that the room was a disaster.

"We're under attack." Thristal said grimly from the doorway where he had braced himself. "We need you, Caravi."
A writing prompt from: ~Lookin4therightart
For: 2/18/2011
#156 Thinking Bliss
Influences: 1-11 scrap, etc, etc.
© 2011 - 2024 openmeadow
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mippins's avatar
You had a few really nice lines in here. :) I liked the last line, even though the whole "and then it was a dream!" thing wasn't something I appreciated. I can see why you did it, though.

I mentioned this in the "Brighter Than the Moon" thing but watch how you format your dialogue at the end. Also, in the first paragraph, you use "it's" where it should be "its" when you're talking about... well, I think the sunrise but that's also a little unclear. Try rewording, maybe?

Nice job. :)